Disclaimer: This can be a polarizing topic and I am open to discussing this with anyone who wishes to further investigate this topic. However, my beliefs are not up for discussion. I am confident in my faith and in choosing to share this perspective, I am not opening myself up to other opinions outside my communication with God. If you disagree, I welcome your personal experience/thoughts, but if you reach out in an attempt to change my beliefs, please reconsider messaging me. Thank you for your understanding.

It feels there is a polarizing contrast between the religious and spiritual worlds. That you have to be one or the other. You are a Christian or you are spiritual and there’s no overlap. That is not my experience. I consider myself a spiritual Christian. What do I mean by that? I believe that Jesus came down from Heaven to absolve us of our sins and that through Him we are saved. I believe in God and His abounding love for us, and through that love we can love others. I believe in the Holy Spirit on earth, giving us the fruits of salvation. I also believe astrology can show us vital information about our personalities, I believe meditation is crucial for a peaceful mind, I believe in crystal energy for healing, and I believe that tarot cards are fun :)

For me personally, my religion and spirituality are intertwined. If you’ve ever followed my morning routines on IG, I meditate, read my bible, journal, pull a card, crystal meditate, etc. all together every morning. In my head, mediation is a chance to connect with my heart, which is rooted in God’s love. It’s a chance to communicate with God. It’s a chance to just float into the spiritual world, outside the material world I exist in at the moment. God is omni-present - He is with me in my meditation and outside it. In terms of energy, I view energy as the Holy Spirit. It’s the life force connecting the world, nature, human beings, and God together. I believe in Guardian Angels, but also refer to them as Spirit Guides at times, and call upon them when needed to give me guidance as I move along the journey God has planned out for me. My spirituality and my religion are one and the same, and I choose to practice this every morning together.

I first began exploring this mode of faith in high school when my home pastor shared his meditation practice with my church youth group. I was fascinated that Christians could mediate and not just pray. You can do both, of course, but you are allowed to be silent and just breathe in God’s presence. It felt reliving. I felt I was learning that religion does not need to have undo pressure on it. I didn’t need to dress up for God and prepare a whole speech of prayer each time. I just needed to be in His presence. I continued to explore this throughout college and post-grad. Then after Jake was hospitalized in October 2019, I went through a very difficult grief process. While I truly still held the love of God in my heart, it was difficult to pull it out from the deepest parts of me. I felt so alone, even alone from God. I always had a clear communication with Him and would genuinely hear His voice when I needed it most. But this time, I couldn’t find Him. I even considered dropping my faith all together. In those moments, I began to explore spirituality more. I stopped calling myself a Christian for a bit. I allowed myself to let go of the expectations I set on myself as a Christian woman and let myself worship what I needed in the moment and practice what felt good. What I found is the more I participated in other spiritual practices the closer to God I felt. That’s when I understood it for myself - my spiritual practice is a part of my worship. When you’re struggling with faith, calling God the Universe, or calling the Holy Spirit energy can be more approachable. For me, I’m worshiping the same thing. I know that Universe is God and God is Universe in my mind, so why does it matter what I call it?

I know this isn’t the same for everyone. I know there are people who do not believe in God and instead believe in the Universe as two separate entities. That’s okay. They understand what they are connecting to, and that’s what matters. I understand that when I hold a crystal or pull a tarot card, it’s grounding me to God as much as when I raise my hands and sing a worship song. And every-time I’ve doubted if this is okay because of someone else’s opinion, I’ve gone back to God, prayed and pleaded with Him in my heart, and found that He knows my heart. He knows how I worship and He understands it. That’s what matters. My spirituality and my religion are singular in meaning and that meaning is to communicate with Him and what He has created for us to experience. I see spirituality as indulging in God’s gifts. He gave us the vision of astrology. He gave us the peace of meditation. He gave us the gifts of Reiki healing. He gave us those practices to use in our worship. So I choose to explore these practices in His name.

I wanted to share this perspective in case there are any others out there who are trying to navigate their spirituality and religion in this day and age. There are so many conflicting opinions of what it looks like, but the truth is, all that matters is what it means to you. What your spiritual practice or worship means to you is more important that someone’s opinion of it. Continue to do you, do what feels good, and stop letting other’s opinions drive your beliefs.

Thanks for reading and for your respecting of my beliefs. I appreciate you!